When my father, Odysseus, and his men sailed off to the Trojan War, they were confident their gods favored a quick victory. Instead, the siege of Troy lasted ten years. After Troy fell, the survivors made their way home to Sparta, Mycenae, Pylos, and elsewhere in the ancient Peloponnese. Neither my father nor any of his troops arrived home with the rest. We waited for years as the news grew worse. Odysseus was dead, we were told,or imprisoned, or, worst yet, he had married another woman and abandoned my mother Penelope, my brother Telemachus, and me.


If he is alive somewhere, his thoughts may wander to Penelope and Telemachus, but he won’t be thinking of me. I am the daughter he doesn’t know exists. Odysseus went off to the Trojan War when his son, Telemachus, was barely old enough to walk. His wife, Penelope, was a teenage bride, and is now a young wife, mother, and queen who has to try to rule Ithaca without him.


I was born seven months after he left. I am a hero’s daughter and a princess of his realm, but I have lived my entire life without a father. I’m nineteen now, and still waiting.


All over the world, and throughout history children grow up as I have. This website will focus on the children of those men and women who have gone off to fight America's wars, and provide information and resources for all who care about military families and want to help.

Saturday, September 4, 2010

More on Military Children with Autism




TROY, Mich. — Military families having children with autism filed a Motion for Preliminary Injunction today against the Department of Defense, alleging that the DoD and its health benefits division, TRICARE, have wrongfully refused to provide health benefits coverage for applied behavior analysis therapy (ABA) . The Motion alleges that children with autism will sustain irreparable injury for each day that goes by without receiving ABA therapy to which they are entitled under the military health benefits statute. The Motion was filed in the case is Berge v. United States of America, et al, No. 10-cv-00373-RBW (DC), and it was assigned to Judge Reggie B. Walton of the federal district court.
ABA therapy is known to be extremely effective in treating children with autism if given at an early stage of development.  It is scientifically validated and includes positive reinforcements and individual goal  setting,  to achieve dramatic behavior modification. ABA therapy allows children with autism the opportunity to reach maximum potential and the hope of becoming independent in their adult lives. With virtual unanimity, physicians, psychiatrists, psychologists, social workers and mental health professionals regard ABA therapy to be the most effective treatment for autism. Yet, the DoD refuses to afford this therapy to autistic children of military families.
The lawsuit contends that the military health benefits division, TRICARE, at the direction of the DoD, incorrectly characterizes ABA therapy as “special education” and thereby improperly excludes ABA therapy from the health care available to members of the military. The families refute this position and demonstrate in their Complaint that many prestigious individuals and organizations, including the United States Army, the Army and Marine Corps Autism Task Force, the Executive Director of the National Autism Center, the Acting Surgeon General of the United States Army, and United States Air Force Major Ella B. Kundu, Diplomate of the American Board of Psychiatry and Neurology, agree that ABA therapy is not “special education.”
The Department of Defense has recently requested that all action on the case be stayed and that the matter be remanded, or sent back, so that the DoD can study the issue further.  The families have vigorously opposed the request for a stay or a remand, contending that time is of the essence for the approximately 20,000 military children with autism.  Counsel for the families assert that the DoD’s policy of denying such care to autistic children of military families is illegal and should be invalidated without delay.
Former Michigan State Senator, David Honigman, co-counsel for the families, stated: “There is only a small window of opportunity for these children to receive this therapy and obtain maximum benefit from it.  The studies show that this therapy yields the most dramatic improvement in abilities if administered at early ages.  The DoD’s denial of coverage based on the assertion that ABA therapy is ‘special education’ is contrary to the plain meaning of the health benefits statute and is incorrect as a matter of law.”
Gerard Mantese, co-counsel for the families, stated: “We have filed this Emergency Motion because the medical and scientific experts establish that these children will be harmed irreparably if they do not receive this therapy at a young age.  Unless the DoD starts living up to its obligations under the law, these children will never achieve the functioning they could otherwise achieve.  These military families give us so much to be thankful for in this country – our freedom and our safety.  Our military should not also be asked to sacrifice proper health care for their children in order to serve their country.”
Contact Information for the military families:
Gerard V. Mantese
David Honigman
Mantese Honigman Rossman and Williamson, P.C.
1361 E. Big Beaver Road
Troy, Michigan 48083
Tel:(248) 457-9200 ext. 203
Fax:(248) 457-9201
email: gmantese@manteselaw.com
Dhonigman@manteselaw.com
firm website: http://www.manteselaw.com
Source: http://www.centredaily.com/2010/09/02/2186286/emergency-preliminary-injunction.html

Friday, September 3, 2010

Readying Families





Between now and October,thousands of Marines and sailors will deploy to Afghanistan. Among them will be the Camp Pendleton-based 1st Marine Division headquarters element; 2nd Battalion, 1st Marine Regiment; 3rd Battalion, 5th Marine Regiment; 1st Combat Engineer Battalion; and the 3rd Light Armored Reconnaissance Battalion.


At Camp Pendleton, just north of Oceanside, California, Karen Gough is the family readiness officer for the 47,000-strong Marine Expeditionary Force, which oversees the Marine units coming home and heading out. Married to a former Marine officer who recently retired, Gough works with 130 other family readiness officers to assist the troops, their spouses and children before, during and after a combat assignment.


"We help with everything, from making sure they have their wills and their shots to making sure single Marines are keeping their parents in the loop," Gough explains. They also work closely with the children of deployed troops, conducting information sessions and gatherings. The focus includes helping younger children understand what the departure of their deployed parent means. "We let them know what Afghanistan is like, what's involved in a deployment and answer their questions so they have a good understanding," Gough said.


About halfway through a deployment, the family readiness officers also help prepare children for a parent's return from war. "We explain to them that Mom or Dad may have changed a little bit and seen some tough things over there," Gough said. "We also tell them that their parent might need some time by themselves." For younger kids, a final session is conducted after their parent returns.


Gough said the work with families today has changed from what she remembers as a military wife."We used to worry more about the spouse," she said. "The spouse is still much of the focus, but we had found that many of the issues were with children, so we've also concentrated on working with them. It's made a big difference."
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Thursday, September 2, 2010

A Duty to Care

Recent studies investigating children’s responses to parental separation during Operation Desert Storm find that children of deployed parents, compared to peers in families of non-deployed service members, had elevated levels of depressive symptoms. Another study found that one-third of children were at high risk for psychological problems and that approximately half of parents reported significant parenting stress during deployment of their spouse.Other investigators have found that children with a currently deployed or recently returned military parent had higher levels of anxiety compared to others in their community.  Students with deployed parents have slightly lower test scores and somewhat more school- and peer-related difficulties, and children aged 12 to 18 years, reported feelings of loss and insecurity, and symptoms of anxiety and depression related to the deployment of a parent.
Here are two initiatives designed to strengthen coping skills of military children with deployed parents. The first focses on the families themselves and the second on professionals who work with them

Family and Child Health Passport Toward Success:
This program for National Guard families is designed to help children and adolescents reconnect with their parents following a return from deployment. The program was developed by the Military Family Research Institute at the request of the Indiana National Guard and is offered two months after a return from deployment. Passport Toward Success stresses family socialization activities using games and other entertaining formats. The activities provide examples of social skills, opportunities to rehearse those skills, and a discussion about generalizing those skills to situations at home.

A preliminary evaluation of the program found that before participation, one half to three quarters of participating children reported worrying about their at-home parent, crying more, feeling that the family was more stressed, and having trouble sleeping. After the program, 90% reported that they had learned new skills for coping with their stresses. 
Coming Together Around Military Families:
The goal of this campaign is to increase awareness and understanding of the unique needs of children aged three or younger, in military families. A major component of the campaign, Duty to Care 1: Supporting Young Children Through Challenging Times, provides interdisciplinary training for professionals who work closely with military families, helping them to better understand how very young children are impacted by loss of a parent's presence. This two-day training provides up-to-date information on the experiences of deployment on families with young children, the results of research on the impact of stress on very young children, strategies for accessing community resources, and ways of working with others to support young children and their military families.

Tuesday, August 31, 2010

Streamlining School


Military families move between postings on a regular basis.  The average military student faces transition challenges more than twice during high school alone, and most military children will attend six to nine different school systems in their lives from kindergarten to 12th grade. The Military Interstate Children's Compact Commission (MIC3) seeks to make transition easier for the children of military families so that they have the same opportunities for educational success as other children and are not penalized or delayed in achieving their educational goals. Thirty-five states are now part of this compact. Though the website is a little vague about exactly what the compact consists of, presumably this is because the more flexible something is, the harder it is to describe.  
Essentially, the compact assists with enrollment (educational records, immunizations, and kindergarten/first grade entrance age), class placement and attendance issues, and eligibility for extracurricular activities.  The compact is especially helpful for students close to high school graduation, assisting in waiving courses required for graduation if similar course work has been completed elsewhere, promoting flexibility as to how students fulfill graduation testing requirements, and allowing a student to receive a diploma from the sending school instead of the receiving school.

The Compact was developed by The Council of State Governments' National Center for Interstate Compacts, the Department of Defense, national associations, federal and state officials, the Department of Education of each state, school administrators and military families.
The Department of Defense will continue to work with the Commission, Council of State Governments, national organizations, and state leaders to bring the remaining fifteen states on board. 


Monday, August 30, 2010

Bike Free!


"The mission of Bike Free is to bring to joy, freedom, and fun of a bicycle ride to others – specifically the children of our military families."
Paul Lebelle and Adam Burkowske are two men who by their own admission no longer qualify as kids, but remember how important their bikes were to them  growing up. It was these memories that were the groundwork for their nonprofit group, Bike Free.  
"As fortunate as we were to have a bike growing up," they say, "we knew that there are so many kids today who aren’t as fortunate.  We spoke about this after work on more than a few occasions and decided we needed to spend all of our spare time planning and preparing for a 6,000+ mile, fund-raising bike ride across, up, and down our great country. With both of our families having military backgrounds, and our country’s increasing involvement in the Middle East and Afghanistan, we knew that children of our military could really use a bicycle.  We believe that being outside in the fresh air, sunshine, and physical activity not only raises your heart rate, but also raises your spirit."
They hope their trip across America (fully self-supported, with about sixty pounds of gear on Cannondale touring bikes) from the Chesapeake Bay to San Diego, will to raise enough money to distribute at least 1,000 bicycles and helmets to military kids by Christmas time.  "With the support of the Rotary and our Friends and Sponsorsand the help of the USO in identifying military families and distributing the bikes, we’ll accomplish our mission!" they say.
Along the way, various fund-raising events will take place including a few dinners at Roy’s Hawaiian Fusion Restaurants.  "We’ll be stopping by Rotary Clubs and other organizations, giving talks and presentations, fairs, and festivals," they report.  "If you want to hold a Bike Free event, please let us know!"
Check out their website, which includes a "where are we?" page, where using their own reports, maps and GPS tracking you can follow their journey. They're in Idaho as I write this on August 30, 2010, headed ultimately for San Diego.  They also post photo albums and slide shows on their site and on You Tube. Here's a link to the website donation page, if you want to help out. Just $10 buys a helmet and $125 buys a bike and a helmet for a military child.  

Sunday, August 29, 2010

Seeing Their Story in Books



 Jeremy Van Wyk, the State Youth Coordinator for the Iowa National Guard, has put together a great list of books that deal with issues affecting military children.  Though most of the books are for young children, a few are meant for older readers.  One of these is entitled My Story: Blogs by Four Military Teens, by Michelle D. Sherman, PhD, and DeAnne M. Sherman (Beaver's Pond Press, Inc. ISBN 9781592983032).  The book is a series of blogs by four military teens expressing their feelings and experiences before, during, and after parental deployment. According to Van Wyk, "it provides support and education for all military teens and pre-teens by honoring their unique joys and sacrifices, addressing their fears and hopes, and exploring how parental deployment affects their lives." The four bloggers in "My Story" are fictional and their blogs are created by the Shermans, but the stories are based on the true experiences of military kids the authors know. "My Story" can also serve as a tool to help non-military teens understand the experiences of others. 

The children's books have the typical assortment of animal characters as focal points, lots of interactive ideas, and upbeat, imaginative story lines.  One that sounds particularly interesting iA Year Without Dad, by Jodi Brunson (Ithaca Press ISBN 0974068314). The story is designed to give children a clearer picture of how long a year might feel  when the parent is deployed.